SARAH Feign ignorance, immediately. That’s the only way to get out of this unscathed. Being lonely is already fucking with my brain. Am I really this fucking weak? It’s no surprise Aaron and the brothers, and even my own brother were able to manipulate me so easily. Julian might have good intentions now, but with men, it’s like having a pure heart triggers something in them: a need or desire to use you, chew you to bits, and spit you out as nothing but shaft. With his chest barely inches away from my head, I can hear the rapid sounds of his heartbeat. Or is it mine? I move my head away from him very slowly, so it doesn’t look deliberate. He’s been very sweet and all, the least I could do is be polite. “I don’t think you want to do that.” He heaved a tired sigh. “Sarah…” “No, really.” I cut in. “I mean it. Trust me, the last thing you want to do right now is prove anything to a woman carrying another man’s…” I pause. Another man’s? I’m pregnant for three men. “I’m carrying their baby, okay? I’m pregnant.” “I’m sorry, what?” He sounds as flabbergasted as he looks. Pale cheeks are devoid of color, as though my words have drained the blood from his face. “Now, don’t give me that look…” He runs his right hand down the length of his short hair. “I’m sorry, it’s just…I’m just…confused. I mean, how?” My face contorts into a frown as I fold my arms across my chest. “Gee, Julian. I don’t know. How do people get pregnant?” He shakes his head in awe. Seeing he has annoyed me, he tries to reach for my hand, but I pull away. “Come on, Sarah. I really didn’t mean to annoy you. It’s just…what are you going to do? Do they know? Was this planned? I mean, with everything that’s happened…” “Your questions are really triggering for me, Julian.” I cut in again. Sincerely, if I had known his visit was going to make me think, I would have stopped him at the door. “And no, they don’t know. It wasn’t planned.” “Would you tell them?” I suck in a deep breath, and slowly exhale through parted lips. The sides of my head are aching all of a sudden. I raise my fingers to rub them slowly. “I’m not sure yet. I don’t know how to.” Yes, they had asked me to be their girlfriend and promised me their undying love and loyalty. But we never talked about kids. We never even talked about future. We were always in the present, living life to the best of it, I never really thought about anything else. Life has decided to force that conversation now. With everything I had gone through with Aaron, I was really hoping I could sit back and relax for a while. Apparently not. Julian helps me take the tray of custard off my body. He sets it down on the cabinet beside my bed. “I just found out four days ago,” I say. “I haven’t had much time to think about it since then.” “Damn. Haven’t they come to see you? They should at least know something is wrong.” I clear my throat, knowing what I’m about to say would sound really absurd. “No, actually.” He raises his right brow. This time, it’s surprise I see in his bright eyes. He says nothing, but his silence speaks volumes. When he dips his both hands into the pocket of his suit pants, I look away from him. “They didn’t.” I tilt my head backwards, looking up at the ceiling as if gravity alone can keep my tears from falling. “Can we not talk about them right now?” My voice is strangled as the losing fight against my tears continues. Julian’s gaze softens when he notices. He sits beside me, his arms spreading over my shoulders—from the bruised blade, to the other. I let myself sit in it for a while, the comfort of a friend. It must only feel weird because I haven’t had one in a long time—a friend, that is. It feels like a soft hug, even when said person isn’t exactly embracing you. “You know what? Let’s go outside. I’m sure you’ve been in this room alone for days.” He breaks the silence, looking down at me. A small smile breaks out of my face. “You’re damn right about that.” He shakes his head, making a tutting sound. “That can’t be good. No wonder you can’t think straight. Come with me,” he holds out his right hand. My gaze drops to examine it. “We’ll step outside, get some fresh air. It’ll help you think.” These lips of mine tug upward in a brighter smile. Why shouldn’t I? He’s the only one who hasn’t lied to me, or indirectly tried to kill me. He’s also the only one who brought flowers. I owe him—and myself—the sight of the sun and people who aren’t nurses. So, I place my hand in his and let him help me out of my bed, cringing when I catch my reflection in the mirror. My left foot and right shoulder are wrapped with a neat cast, while I’m clad in a sea blue hospital gown. Not my most flattering moment, I can tell you that for free. My hair is braided into two neat pig tails. It makes me look seventeen, not twenty-seven. The floor is chilly underneath the sole of my feet. Julian helps me into my furry slippers, and I thank him with a nod. Kevin isn’t sitting outside my door when we come out of my room. However, I hear his voice from the room standing opposite mine. What is he doing there? Is that some form of guest room? I know he couldn’t have paid for a room here just to be next to me. That’s silly on so many levels. I’m still mad at him, so I look away without a second thought. Julian’s hand hovers at my back, close enough to catch me if I falter. “We’re going to take the elevator.” He says, as if sensing my panic over having to go down flights of stairs. I heave a sigh of relief. “That’s much better.” He presses the button leading to the ground floor. I don’t know what it is, but it reminds me of that day in the elevator…with Malachi. Gulping down my saliva, I shake my head. I’m too angry and confused to get horny. If I’m going to get through this without falling to a million pieces, I need to think with my head, and not my… “Baby?” The voice, the sound that comes from right behind me. It yanks me right out of my line of thought, grounding me in the present I need to desperately escape. My heart could leap from my chest to my throat, and the shock would be nothing conspired to what I feel right now. I don’t want to turn around, or look him in the eyes. But I can’t stop myself, not after I’ve spent the past few days thinking about him, about them. It isn’t my choice that moves me, but the force of gravity itself. The force that bends under the weight of our love, that obeys the energy between both of us. I am helpless against this energy. So, I find myself face to face with him. My man, my Jaxon. The rest of the world fades away. His warm brown eyes light up on seeing me. His doubts are immediately erased. Jaxon stands tall in a hospital gown the same color and style as mine. It’s funny, isn’t it? The first time we wear matching outfits is in a fucking hospital. “Baby,” he croaks again, walking slowly towards me.